Archives for February 2016

Radiation~ The Daily Routine

Radiation is going great so far.  11 treatments down, 23 more to go!

I frequently get asked questions about radiation.  It seems a bit more mysterious than chemotherapy, and not as many people understand it.  I had no idea what to expect!

This post is to uncover some of the mystery behind radiation treatments.  Of course, I can only speak on my experience of chest/breast radiation for breast cancer.   I figured I would share a little about what it’s like on this post – both to educate you, the reader, and also to help someone who is going through cancer who may stumble upon this blog (or you may forward this to friends you know who have radiation in their future!)

First – what is radiation and why radiation?

Mayo clinic says: Radiation therapy for breast cancer uses high-powered X-rays to kill cancer cells. Rapidly growing cells, such as cancer cells, are more susceptible to the effects of radiation therapy than are normal cells. Radiation therapy may be used to treat breast cancer at almost every stage. It’s an effective way to reduce your risk of breast cancer recurring after surgery. It can also help control the spread of breast cancer .

I will have 34 total treatments.  I go every weekday, Monday through Friday.  My radiation treatments take place in the North Tower of Lexington Medical Center and my appointment time is 9:30 which works well with my schedule.  After getting the three children off to school (Samuel and Selah in Kindergarten and Hannah in preschool), I make the 30-40 min drive to LMC.

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Daily, I enter the radiation oncology area at LMC, and check in by entering my last 4 digits of my SSN into a computer.

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I go straight back to the female locker room and exchange my shirt for my beautiful (haha) pink gown.  Then I go sit in the female waiting area.  This is my favorite part, because I get to connect with other women who are going through radiation.  It’s a special sisterhood – as we all sit there in our pink gowns.

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I get to see mostly the same women each day, and we always catch up on how we’re doing, how many treatments we have left.    I usually only have to wait here 5-10 minutes at the most.

Then, it’s my turn.  One of the technicians comes to get me, and I follow her into the room with the radiation machine.  I take my right arm out of my gown, lay on a table with my arms above me, head turned to the left, and the technicians make adjustments.  The machine is a big cream/grey machine that rotates all around me. I must lie perfectly still.  I cannot feel anything, other than sometimes my right arm gets very sore in that position (they say it is due to the lymph node surgery on that side).

I’m usually only on the table 15-20 minutes.  I have come to really love the technicians also, as I usually see the same ones daily.  One in particualar I have connected with over our mutual love for New York City!

After my treatment is over, I go change back into my clothes, and apply a prescribed steroid cream over the treated area, that is supposed to help prevent burning.

As I make my way back to my car, I thank God for another one down and jump back into “life as usual”.  Ministry/work, pick up children from school, homework, family time, dinner, bedtime!

The side effects of radiation are most commonly fatigue and skin burns.  I have been struggling with fatigue since before radiation but thankfully I have not noticed that it is any worse since starting these treatments.  My skin is holding up well so far.  The side effects are cumulative, so I continue to pray that they will be minimal.

If you have any questions, feel free to ask! As you probably know by now, I’m pretty open to talking about any of my experiences.

I am so grateful for your prayers.   Please pray that the side effects would be minimal as I continue in these treatments.  Please continue to pray for “divine appointments” at my treatments.  And finally I could use prayers for balance in my life as I’m feeling very stretched thin in many areas these days, as radiation takes up about 2 hours each day (considering drive time).

I’m thankful that God continues to mold me, shape me, and refine me through this journey.  He has truly carried me.
Yesterday in church, our pastor referenced James 1:2-3 “ Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds,  for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness.”

He said “you don’t count it joy because of the trial, but because of what the trial is doing”.  I think I even said “Amen” aloud because that is what this is all about!
His grace abounds through cancer…

through chemotherapy, hair loss, loss of strenth, surgery, another surgery, radiation, and everything in between…His grace abounds because this trial, this testing is DOING SOMETHING. The pain has a purpose.   That, my friends, gets me excited. (What the trial is doing, not the trial itself).

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So whatever you’re going through today, remember that there’s a God who cares, and He can give you hope in the hard.

If you know someone with a recent cancer diagnosis who is facing radiation treatments, maybe this post could help shed some light on what it’s like.

The Divine Romancer

Everyone loves a great love story.

In October 2003, a great love story began.

A clean cut young man at the office caught the attention of my dad.

At the time, love was the last thing on my mind.  I was living overseas, working on an acquisition integration team of a large corporation.  My weeks were full with work, my weekends full with travel.

In October I came back to the States for a visit, to take a class for work and see family.  It was during this visit that my dad decided to play matchmaker.   An invitation issued and accepted, and I found myself awkwardly introducing myself to a stranger on my parents porch.

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But it wasn’t awkward for long.

As the night progressed, my mind started running away from me.  I mentally put my first name with his last, and thought it sounded right.  Everything just clicked and I felt sure that he was feeling the same way…

Up until the time when we went to say goodbye.  No request for my phone number, or email, or even a hug. All I got was a handshake and a stand-offish “nice to meet you”.

The next day, I returned to Austria, confused.  Surely, I couldn’t have been THAT wrong about my feelings, or his, or how well the first date (a bind date, at my parents house), despite the unique circumstances, felt so right.

A couple of days later, he asked for my email address from my dad at work, and the rest, as they say, is history.  Come to find out, he was cautious about how a relationship would work between a gal living in Europe and a guy living in South Carolina.

I’m so glad this small town guy took a risk on this girl with a touch of wanderlust.

Over the next year, we got to know each other through countless emails and phone calls first, then weekend visits.  Eventually I moved from Austria to Atlanta, then ultimately back to Columbia. Nineteen months after that awkward first encounter, we were married.

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I’m so thankful for the gift of romantic love; for the gift of my husband.  The love we share points us to a Perfect Love from a Perfect Pursuer.

This Perfect Pursuer chased my own heart for years. Many many years before He captured it fully.  Many years I affirmed my love for Him, but it was artificial. Superficial.

 

But God didn’t give up. He kept pursuing.

And finally, in 2006 I surrendered to His pursuit, and fell deep into His oceans of grace.

I was His, and He was mine.

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This morning I was talking with a precious friend at church, and with tears in her eyes she shared how God was moving so much in her life.  It took me back to those early days when I first fully surrendered my life to the Lord.  I saw myself in her and could nearly feel how exciting and overwhelmed she was feeling.

Valentines Day is the perfect opportunity to consider God’s love.

God the Father is constantly pursuing us into a deeper love relationship with Him.

As God pursues our heart, we cannot remain indifferent.  His pursuit requires a response. The response of surrender is “Yes, Lord”.

Have you entered this love relationship with the Father?  Has there ever been a time in your life which you surrendered yourself fully to Him?  If you are unsure, I would love to talk with you or email with you about what this means.

If you sense His loving voice beckoning you to surrender your life, DON’T WAIT!Today can be the day of salvation~ the day you enter into the greatest love story of your life!

If you already have a relationship with the Lord, how is Christ pursuing your heart today?  How are you responding to His pursuit?

Something I’ve been pondering lately is that in everything ~ in the good of life, the hard, the painful, and the joyful~ in ALL things, the Divine Romancer is pursuing our heart.  His ultimate goal is to captivate more and more of our heart as we love him more. Many times he uses the sweetest parts of life to beckon us to Himself.  He also uses the difficult seasons to draw us closer, refine us and rid us from heart idols that rob our affection for Him.

It’s been helpful for me to ask myself this question when I have a difficult circumstance, or a trying time especially “How is the Divine Romancer pursuing me through this?  How can this circumstance serve to draw me nearer to Him?”

I recently read some writing from a twenty-somthething student at Fuller Seminary.  This stirred my soul~ may it stir yours today  “Seeking God means letting my yearning heart meet His yearning heart. It’s a beautiful interaction between two lovers. I don’t reach out to get His attention or win His affection. I reach out to meet His loving gaze. I don’t seek Him to stir His heart, I seek Him to encounter His passion for me that’s already burning in His heart.”

If you feel stagnant in your pursuit of God, remember back to a time in your Christian walk that you had a greater passion to know Him and love Him more.  Consider this question~ what are the things in life which stir my affections for HIm?  Is it nature? Is it solitude in His Word? Is it writing or music?  Is it spending time sharing with friends who love the Lord? Or maybe it is through serving those in need.

Ask yourself – what are the things in life which stir your affections for him?  He has made each of us perfectly unique, so what stirs your affection for Him is likely different from mine.  Make sure your daily schedule has margin to incorporate the things that stir your affection for the Lord.

Author AW Tozer says in “The Pursuit of God” (one of my favorite books, by the way) “To have found God and still to pursue Him is the soul’s paradox of love”   Ponder that for a bit in the quiet spaces in your afternoon.

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Today  is Valentine’s Day, and whether or not you have a “Valentine” to share this day with, if you have faith in Christ, you have a Divine Valentine.  Jesus is the lover of our soul; a Divine Romancer who pursues you with His love, grace, beauty, mercy, goodness, perfection.

Allow Him to stir your soul, and then, by His grace, actively listen to Him, overflow the truth of the Gospel, and continue to follow Him, wherever He leads.

 “For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers,  nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.”  Romans 8:38-39

5 down, 29 to go

A quick radiation update:

My first full week of radiation is complete!

Compared to chemo, radiation has been very easy to tolerate.   The treatments themselves are not painful.  It’s basically laying perfectly still on a big grey machine that rotates all around me.  I can’t feel anything while it’s happening.  I’m usually in and out in 20 minutes.

I have been more tired this week, and my skin is getting pink.  There is a lotion that I apply after each treatment.

My last day of radiation is Thursday, March 24.

 

5 down, 29 to go!

Thank you so much for your continued prayers.

Let’s continue to journey together…

April 21, 2015

It was a Tuesday.  The day before, I had a mammogram (my very first), then an ultrasound, then a biopsy of three areas of “concern” in my right breast.

Tuesday afternoon, I was in my car when I got “the call”.  I remember the call like it was yesterday.  The kind nurse on the other end of the phone said those words…”It’s cancer”.  She then shared that she had prayed for me before picking up the phone to make that call.  She didn’t have to say that.  As a matter of fact, she could probably get in trouble for saying that.  But she took the time to pray for me, at that time an unknown patient, and then had the guts to TELL me she prayed for me.

It was a kiss from heaven to remind me, as my world was shattering all around me, when life felt out of control, that there was someOne still in control.

I don’t remember much else from the phone call.  In the moments after I put the phone down, all I could think of was my three sweet children and husband.

In those moments, cancer went from a terrible disease that happened to other people, to a world-rocking diagnosis that could possibly leave my children motherless and my husband a single dad of three young children.

My emotions were all over the place in those first few days, but I remember so clearly feeling so called to walk this journey publicly.  I felt so called to write and share what God could do through cancer.  I clung to the promise that He could use it for good (Romans 8:28).

Throughout this entire journey, I’ve clung with all my might to the “story beneath the story”.   It’s the unseen story~ the story of FAITH that God is writing in my life and the lives of those I love.  Cancer is merely one of God’s instruments to write this “story beneath the story” in my life.

Cancer? That’s the seen story. It’s the temporal story. It’s real, but it’s not the most important story that God is writing here.  My God is using this terrible disease in so many amazing ways. Beauty from ashes.  I hope I’m clear in sharing those glimpses of His abounding grace.  The faith story is eternal. It’s what I want to focus  on – not just through cancer but through all of life.  I can so easily forget where to fix my eyes – and as soon as I start looking at my circumstances, I SINK!

By God’s grace, and Lord-willing, it appears that the final stretch of this seen story ~ my cancer journey~ is nearing an end.   Seven weeks of radiation, starting Monday, and every three week herceptin treatments till early May.  Then scans every so often, a daily pill for five years.  And this seen story draws to a close.

Copyright Becky Williamson Photography WEBSITE: www.beckywilliamsonphotography.com EMAIL: beckywilliamsonphotography@gmail.com

But as long as I’m drawing breath, the unseen story – the story of faith continues.  And I want to keep writing and sharing this.  Not to draw attention to ME, or MY story – but to the One who is writing ALL of our stories.

I have a passion to inspire and encourage women in the trenches of life~ whether it’s a woman feeling stretched thin in the grind of life; a friend whose heart is tender and vulnerable in a difficult season or waiting, a mother struggling to find her purpose, or a sister in Christ who is walking her own story of suffering.  I’ve been this woman and I long to listen, and say “yes, me too”.

I have a passion to remind my readers that through a relationship with Jesus there is purpose behind the pain, goodness in the grime of life, mission in motherhood, opportunities in the ordinary,  joy in the journey, a Savior in  your suffering.

Many days, I write simply to remind myself.

As the Lord closes the chapter entitled “cancer”, I will continue to write as the Lord continues to teach me, mold me, encourage me and draw me deeper into His loving arms.

My words, I pray, point to THE Word ~ Jesus, the Word made flesh. My words are just an expression of who He is to me….just one imperfect woman seeking to be an extravagant worshipper with my life…one woman, just like you, covered in His abounding grace seeking to Know the Grace-giver, and make Him known.

Will you read along, friends? Let’s continue to journey together.

(From Exodus 15~ portions from my chronological daily reading this morning)..My soul swells in worship to who God is!  He defeats all enemies~ Pharaoh’s army, cancer, and the ultimate enemy- satan!

2The Lord is my strength and my song,
    and he has become my salvation;
this is my God, and I will praise him,
    my father’s God, and I will exalt him.

Your right hand, O Lord, glorious in power,
    your right hand, O Lord, shatters the enemy.
In the greatness of your majesty you overthrow your adversaries;
    you send out your fury; it consumes them like stubble.

The enemy said, ‘I will pursue, I will overtake,
    I will divide the spoil, my desire shall have its fill of them.
    I will draw my sword; my hand shall destroy them.’
11 “Who is like you, O Lord, among the gods?
    Who is like you, majestic in holiness,
    awesome in glorious deeds, doing wonders?

13 “You have led in your steadfast love the people whom you have redeemed;
    you have guided them by your strength to your holy abode.

17 You will bring them in and plant them on your own mountain,
    the place, O Lord, which you have made for your abode,
    the sanctuary, O Lord, which your hands have established.
18 The Lord will reign forever and ever.”

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yes.